Obedience. It's a long word. It has many syllables. It means:
noun: 1. compliance with someone's wishes or orders or acknowledgement of their authority.
2. Submission. (according to Dictionary.com).
But, it's more than that. It's hard too. Hard to do. Hard to understand. But, it is also necessary. When we become a follower of Christ, we begin our journey to many things. God never promises that the road will be easy or without potholes (or all out sinkholes).
He never promises that we'll understand the road while we are traveling it - be that by plane, train, car, bike, running or, yes, even walking. BUT, he does promise it will be worth it.
No one has to understand your acts of obedience. Those acts are between you and God. Perhaps you can try to explain them, but I'd wager a guess that you may not be able to find words to fully explain it. I struggle with that. Sometimes explaining it, or trying to, just makes the act sound even crazier. And yet, God is still asking you to do it - whatever that "it" may be.
Obedience is a conscious act, one that you need to practice at. Will you always get it? Probably not. Will you fight with God over the thing he has asked you to do? Probably, I sure did. Will you doubt God and try to talk yourself into the idea that God would never ask that of you? Quite possibly. But, your obedience (and mine) holds so much for your life and your walk as God blesses you and gives you more ways to be obedient.
So, wake up, wipe the vestiges of sleep from the eyes of your life of control, stretch out the arms of your analytical, must-know-everything being and step out. Spread the wings of your obedient heart. It is longing to do something for God. Soar in his love and provision. He will make you strong when you think you cannot continue. I promise you, the journey and the work will be worth it.
What has God been asking you to do?
Isaiah 40:31 "but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."